Monday, December 22, 2014

Raise Both Of Your Arms, Sir.

It's probably time to update this blog. My cousin, Ryan, just got back from NY and stopped by last weekend. One of the first questions he asked was, "So do you have any new one-arm stories?"

Blogging fail.

Yes, yes we do. I have just been a slacker. 

So I will be combining my Festival of Trees recap with a classic one-arm tale.

If you just want the one-arm story, skip to the end. If you aren't a grinch, read about our experience helping out the kids at Primary Children's Hospital.

Festival of Trees happened this month. My mom made the journey from Sac-Town to help me out. I was ridiculously sick for the whole event, so I did not get to enjoy it like I would have liked to. 

My amazing Aunt Kim came and dominated the decorating. Seriously, I don't know what we would have done without her. My grandparents were also champions. My grandma spent hours painting nutcrackers with me and setting up the display. My mother-in-law, Mary, and my sister-in-law, Monique, wired all of the ornaments on. My brother Derek and Porter showed up for like the last five seconds. Porter gets credit for hooking us up with a signed football from the BYU football team, signed game programs, a signed basketball from the BYU basketball team, as well as game-worn cleats and gloves. Derek just gets credit for being in the pics:)

The process went down like so:

I'm all about that base...of the tree.

Getting our fluff on.

Wire machines.

Kim the ribbon master...two years running.

Comes all the way out to Utah just to serve those in need.

Grandpa just had back surgery, but he did help with the painting (as you can see it made it to his forehead).

Coming along....

Thanks to Porter and his sweet hook-ups with BYU football, we had cleats, gloves, and face masks.

Grandma was all about the details.

Tree topper.

The nutcrackers Grandma and I spent hours painting.

So. Much. Blue.

Aunt Kim still doing her thing.

My decorating crew.

Lots of BYU gear/memorabilia.

A Cougar fan's dream.

The floor display.

Our poster contraption.

Porter and I with the finished product...and the BYU shirts weren't even planned. #winning

My hero.

The whole gang.

Once again it was a success. There were a few people who fought over it when it came to the auction. It sold for a LOT of money (like seven times the amount we spent to make the tree). It would not have been possible without those who contributed (both physically and financially). 

The day after opening night, Porter had to travel out to Philly. He was doing one of his inspirational speaking gigs.

In order to get on the plane, Porter went through security. Instead of going through the traditional metal detector, Porter went through one of these bad boys:

I know my last blog was on airport staff as well, and I promise I'm not trying to pick on them, it just seems they struggle with people who are a little different. 

Porter walked into it and faced the sticker showing him how to stand. He spread his feet apart and lifted up his arm just like the example shown on the sticker image in front of him. 

The TSA worker standing on the other side started to get frustrated with him when she only saw one arm lifted above his head.

TSA Worker: "Sir, could you please stand exactly like the example on the sticker?"

Porter: "Ummm, I am."

TSA Worker: "No sir, you need to put both arms above your head."

Porter: "I only have one."

Now the TSA worker thinks Porter is messing with her.

TSA Worker: "What? Sir, remove your jacket and your hat."

Porter does what he's asked.

TSA Worker: "Oh. I guess you only do have one arm. Ok, go ahead..."

One day those airport staffers will get it right. Today is just not that day.

Until next time,